Life has a way of sneaking up on a guy. One moment you’re a carefree kid and the next, well, you’ve become part of your environment, shaped by the pressures of reality. Those hopes and dreams of youth have all but faded from memory, leaving the slightest trace of regret.

Change tends to be a good thing and we often discover new ways to experience satisfaction no matter the circumstances. But wouldn’t it be great if there were a way to reach back in time and reclaim the excitement of your younger years? What if you could slow time’s relentless march and savor each passing moment? Or maybe you’d spend that time rebuilding the hope and compassion of an earlier time, before the hassles and worry of adulthood.

Whatever your goal, I believe it’s possible to throw off the chains of work and weariness. And more than just possible, I believe it’s doable. The key is to stop pushing and striving against the world and, instead, realize that change comes from the inside-out.

Your identity can be explained by evolution and cultural adaptation, but it is controlled by consciousness. By you. So if you want to turn back the clock and lay the groundwork for a better tomorrow, it’s time to take a closer look at the only thing you can really change: yourself.

Here is a 6 step method for transforming your life

6 Steps to Personal Transformation

Step 1: Craft Your Vision

You are a conscious being trapped in a physical body. In order to create real and lasting change on the outside, you need to organize your internal world. This begins with a simple question:what do you want?

There is no shame in not knowing immediately. In fact, I ask myself this question almost every day and the answer seems to change constantly depending on my mood, environment, and recent experiences. However, over time, you can identify a theme and as you peer into those similar answers you will eventually discover a purpose.

By purpose, I mean a driving desires to change the world in a specific way. This generally falls into one of two categories . . .

• Correction: you have experienced a grievous pain in the past and are now driven to protect others from the same fate.
• Contribution: you have enjoyed a wonderful experience in the past and desire to share that same pleasure with the world.

The best way to discover what you want is to continually ask yourself questions. Rely on your new friends: what, why, how, when, where, and who. They will guide you through this process and eventually bring you to your true identity. After all, you were born to change the world, so stop saying “I can’t” and have a little faith!

Step 2: Increase Your Knowledge

Creating a vision for improving the world is just the first step. Next you’re going to need to develop the wisdom and skill to make your dreams come true. This begins with learning.

Let’s face it, most of us have been molded by the expectations of our peer group and work environment. We probably know a little bit too much about the NFL and Facebook, but our knowledge of influence and change is pitifully small.

This step requires some courage. It’s going to take time and humility to submit yourself to the rigors of self-education. You’ll need to read books, browse blog posts, dig through Wikipedia, and maybe even watch a documentary or two.

The good news is that once you get started, you’ll discover a burning passion that drives you forward. This is what you’ve always wanted and even if you can’t have it today, at least your one step closer to realizing your destiny.

Step 3: Be Open to Feedback

The real trick is to avoid overconfidence. I’d be lying if I told you I’ve never made this mistake or that you will somehow avoid it. However, you can minimize the risk of premature action if you remain humble and be willing to adapt.

Feedback is essential for progress. It’s nature’s way of letting us know when to turn and how fast to move. And I’m not just talking about what Uncle Bob decides to share with you over the Holidays. I’m saying you need to look at the results of your actions and ask: is what I’m doing working?

Track your progress. Measure something tangible. Find a way to wrap your head around the process. Otherwise, you’ll charge blindly into walls forever. And from personal experience, I can assure you that is both a painful and extremely slow way to proceed.

Step 4: Embrace the Culture

Once you gain knowledge of your chosen path and get a little experience walking that road, you might want to consider finding other warriors on a similar journey. The world is an awfully big place and, recently, it’s all been crammed into the space of your computer screen.

Take advantage of this amazing resource to find like-minded people. Share your vision, or at least your current step, and don’t be afraid to ask for help. Chances are you’ll make some friends and maybe even discover a mentor or two.

The best part about getting involved in an established culture, whether it’s a local group of people or an online platform like this blog, is the positive reinforcement you’ll receive. Psychologists say that we are the aggregate of the 5 people we spend the most time with. As you change your peer group, you’ll also change your influences. You’ve essentially created your own environment and taken control of your personal evolution. Say hello to natural, effortless personal transformation!

Step 5: Track Your Progress

Now that you’re equipped with the basic tools of self-growth, it’s time to see results. Break down your vision into milestones, goals, and steps.

Set small objectives that are easy to accomplish. Not only will this help you focus on the next and most important move, but it will reward you with a constant sense of accomplishment. We all know that progress equals excitement, so make sure to create a plan that keeps you energized and motivated to keep working!

Step 6: Keep Things in Perspective

You’ve become a true warrior. The world is in your hands and even though you’re training may span years, you’ve managed to recapture your dreams and turn them into something real and doable.

Sadly, most people stop here. I’ve done it too. We forget that life isn’t about accomplishment or glory. It’s about experience, about enjoying every moment in the most fulfilling way. No result or achievement can ever make up for a life wasted in work and worry.

Remember, life is a journey. It’s important to choose a worthwhile destination and take those first steps, but after that, sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride. After all, it’s all you get. Make it count!

Original Source: thechangblog.com

The mind not only constructs the props and scenario for ongoing visuals and sensory memory, space and time, it also provides the dynamics to hold or to reject these artificial units.

In the midst of the feature films inside the head, there is always the fixation on control by the “I” who lives in the linear reality of simulated depth. A good amount of pressure, as control, is kept over our world, ourselves, what we want, what we hold dear – family, spouse, career, etc. etc. etc. More obsessed with control than with real power, we surely confuse the two.

Control is a sad imitation of the force of spirit power of Will. The brand power we know is called willpower. Willpower is forged; it goes hand in hand with personality building and the generation of self-control, invariably based on fear and anger.   It has little to do with Will, the power we are capable of tapping into within.

Control relates to physical or mental performance. When we sense that we might be “losing it”, when we feel overwhelmed by another person or circumstance, our experience is one of impotence or powerlessness, followed by the corollaries, anger and fear. Greater effort is made, which means greater organization, more stress and pressure, culminating in even greater control of the surroundings and ourselves. By triggering kinetic motor power, increased willpower simulates genuine power.

Real power is felt. Where there is control, there can be no power; they function on two entirely different planes. Shifting to an authentic power modality involves letting go of ordinary control over the outside world as imposed by the sequential mind. This implies mastery or dominion. Whereas willpower responds to personal interest and survival, real Power, or Will cannot be made or contained. It arises and flows. It is birthed from within, beyond the tenacity of the thinking mind.

Power corresponds to depth, neither intellectual nor emotional. As pure Will, it derives from Consciousness and the awareness of being at cause. It places one, beyond the noisy personality, at the center of the universe as a sun. A minuscule fragment of magnificence, it involves you and only you. Its power may be summoned and employed by the conscious personality but it is never available through force or tension. It spells a way of being that is natural, relaxed, and fully aware. A powerful person is sensed and doesn’t need to exert control. A powerful person is free.

For all the talk of freedom, most people prefer some form or another of dependence. Impotence and powerlessness create dependence, which temporarily cover up the fear of being alone. Unfortunately, people would rather control themselves and one another, than be free and powerful.

Original Source from The Inner Woman

Zulma Reyo, B.A., M.A. is a native of Puerto Rico, fluent in English, Spanish, French and Portuguese.  She holds a B.A. and M.A. degree from New York University in Comparative Literature and Education.  A decade of research in Europe and India led her to blend energetic, yogic and psychotherapeutic methods, Eastern and Western paradigms and world religions, developing a coherent training on the human energetic structure that she has taken to different countries. Zulma is the founder of the Inner Alchemy School of Consciousness, teaching the intricate nature of the subtle human energetic anatomy and gender variance. Tweet her @zulmareyo

Someone I was advising recently said, “I feel my demons are stronger than I am.” I couldn’t lie to him. I said, “You know what? I think you’re right.” I’ve been in the same situation before. For many people, dealing with difficult negative emotions feels overpowering. This is very often a correct assessment; feeling helpless in the face of problems often comes from not cultivating the proper skills needed to confront them. People know deep down that they haven’t equipped themselves with the skills needed to deal with certain emotions and events, and they punish themselves for it. Instead of punishing ourselves, though, we can learn to build a stronger mind.

If you want to fight a dragon, you have to arm yourself. You can’t go out butt-naked with no armor or weapons and expect to win. To do so would be foolish. Even if you believe in your innate self, there are things you can do to optimize your daily functioning. You can’t just suddenly decide to triumph over your difficulties in the same way you can’t just suddenly decide to become a heavyweight boxer and compete. Cultivating strength requires work, and even when it feels impossible it’s always time well-spent.

When you feel your demons are stronger than you, you’re probably onto something. If you continue to feel helpless and sorry for yourself, you let the problems get stronger while you stagnate. But if you use this sense of helplessness to cultivate inner-strength and courage, you’ll overcome them. The key is to direct this energy inward. Meditate. Exercise. Work on yourself. Build the confidence and gusto required to rise above your mental baggage. Recognize the absurdity of allowing concepts to bring you down. This is one of the core lessons of Zen— what you think is not real. Thoughts are all abstractions. We shouldn’t take them so seriously. Latching onto external concepts and feeling disappointed often makes people feel like the world is crumbling in on them. This feeling of dread is truly difficult. But only through conscious work and practice can we overcome it.

There’s no magical solution to deeply-rooted problems and concerns, but if you do a little work each day to make yourself a more wholesome and rounded person, you eventually build the strength to confront your demons when they come about. This is a lifelong journey and there are always surprise rewards along the way. The key is to stick with it, to practice your best practice every day and not to give up out of disappointment or disillusionment.

It’s the nature of organisms on Earth to adapt. Doesn’t matter if you’re a moth or an advanced mammal; over time you’re either going to change or die out. This is basic scientific theory but can be also used metaphorically to understand daily life. The following interpretation isn’t to be confused with ‘social Darwinism’, but instead should be seen as a simple natural analogy.

The crux of this is “humans adapt”, not just on the large scale of base physical or psychological evolution but in the simplest ways in every moment. We adapt to everything. Single people adapt to relationships. Poor people adapt to sudden riches. Rich people adapt to sudden poverty. Nations and races adapt to their geographic locations and environmental conditions. Humans as they exist today vary vastly in appearance and background— the result of millions of years of collective evolution on various planes. On a day-to-day level we are constantly evolving in more nuanced ways. To peer into this process and reflect upon it is to recognize the power of both the individual and the community to foster positive behaviors and traits.

Returning to basics: in a very fundamental universal sense, change is the way of the world. There is no moment that is the same as the moment before it. You are a ‘different’ person at the end of this sentence than you were at the beginning. And yet beneath all of these environmental and sensory changes is your inborn sense of self— this is what I like to refer to as the spirit. This never changes. It only becomes more or less visible depending on how closely you’re paying attention.

The spirit is what exists in every person beneath endless layers of personal experience, cultural conditioning and conceptual chatter. It’s your fundamental being. It’s also what makes you aware of being. And in this sense it transcends being alive. I believe this is the root of religious theories of God and the afterlife. The spirit as felt during meditation and other deep religious experiences is perceived as being above and beyond the self because it is. It doesn’t exist in the physical realm and this is precisely what makes it feel so transcendent. The surface-level beliefs you have about who you are, even down to your family, values and background, are still not who you really are. Underneath all this is a place free of concepts or influence.

This is important to remember when we think about change. When I say that you change in every moment, you may interpret that as some sort of fundamental change. People often refer to their past and say, “I was a different person then.” This is only partially true. In reflecting daily on how shallow our interpretations of self often are, we remember not to let these false notions impact the decision-making process. If someone asks you who you are and your first instinct is to talk about your career, your family or your goals, it’s time to dig a bit deeper.

That isn’t to say that you should make the conversation all weird and spiritual— this is an internal process. You can say one thing and think another. There’s no real need to share information about your ‘true self’ with others. Merely reflecting within yourself and trying to peel away false layers of identity lets you find a certain peace. This peace will emanate and put others at ease. It will make you more charismatic, since you begin to identify with your deep spiritual self rather than surface-level adornments. There’s no need to communicate it directly; it communicates itself through a shift in motivations, actions and thought processes.

Most people treat themselves like a fancy car with a neglected engine— they take care of the surface and maintain appearances but are afraid to pop open the hood and work on what’s really important to their deepest functioning and purpose. Meditation is popping open the hood. It lets you see what might initially appear to be “the ugly truth” and then slowly and methodically rid yourself of the grime and gunk that hold you back. It’s a degreaser.

If you choose to meditate regularly, over time, when you think, “Who am I?” you won’t say, “I’m a Certified Public Accountant with a 3.8 GPA, $300,000 in the bank, a wife, two kids, 3 cars, a house and a dog,” but, simply, “I am.” Your essence is who you are stripped of all materials, all physical matter and all cultural conditioning. That doesn’t mean you’re supposed to throw your material life away and go wander the forest. Some people misinterpret Zen and think they have to become monkish or deny life. I advocate the exact opposite. Live your life fully, work hard, cultivate greatness, do whatever you want, but with this deeper awareness that you are not anything you do, have, or achieve. You simply are. And, most importantly, recognize that you can only identify with this inner-strength and benevolence to the extent that you’re willing to take some time each day to quietly reflect on it. In doing so, you really do transcend.

This is real adaptation. It’s a remedy to most modern problems. It’s recognizing your spirit as your center rather than things outside yourself. Doing that is like recognizing Pluto as the center of the solar system. How can external orbiting things possibly be your essence? You are your own essence! To misinterpret this fundamental truth is going to cause some problems. Meditation helps you get it straight.

Charlie Ambler is the creator of The Daily Zen and @dailyzen on Twitter. He began the site in 2008 as a way to chronicle his study of Zen and practice of meditation. He is currently working on raising enough funding to work on Daily Zen full-time and is also writing a book about Zen practice and contemporary life. Charlie live in Greenpoint, Brooklyn and enjoys playing drums, walking, and petting other peoples’ dogs. You can support his work by clicking here.