When we are kids we start off with a fearless spirit. Un-jaded and un-molded by the current curriculum of our society. As we grow up our conditioning forces us to think within the confines dictated by our parents, religion, school, society, etc. By the time we are adults we become influenced by F.E.A.R (false evidence appearing real). Essentially what this means is that it is all taking place within our minds. Of course there are some fears that are legit and trigger a fight or flight response such as moving out of the way of speeding car. That is a legit fear, but fear based on something that might not happen, or could happen but won’t harm you in any significant way is the type of fear that keeps us within our boundaries. It’s the fear that puts us in our place and creates regret down the road. When you release this fear, life truly begins at the edge of your comfort zone.
What can help you along your journey is to observe several basic areas.
Number one is total commitment. Many times we are not fully committed in what we are doing therefore we have a lot of fear about the outcome of an endeavor we weren’t fully indulged in to begin with. We are often distracted and pulled away from our goals. The less committed we are, the less we are driven and dedicated to making it work. How much time do you commit EVERY DAY to your aspirations or new direction in life? Are you fearful of it not working out even though you have failed to allocate significant time to nurture it.?
The next one appropriately follows the previous, and that is: repetition. Doing the same thing over and over again can make us fearless. This may sound like obsessive compulsion but to be more specific I am referring to repetition of positive habits that lead toward your goals and whatever makes you happy. You must become obsessed with positive actions that bring you closer to where you want to be. As you begin to do that you will begin to brainwash yourself (in a good way) into thinking you can accomplish what you set out to do. You will see obstacles in a different way, rather then becoming fearful of them.
Many people work in jobs they hate, but changing their career is fearful because it will create too many uncertainties. It is logical to worry about how the bills will get paid, mortgage, car payments, etc. It’s perfectly normal to be concerned with all that. People however can become so disabled by the thought of this that they cease to take action toward changing their life. Instead they settle for what is certain and avoid pursuing what is seemingly uncertain. Jordan Belfort once said “The only thing stopping you from achieving your goals is the bullshit excuse you keep telling yourself”
‘Neuroplasticity’ is a great book by the psychiatrist Norman Doidge in which he talks about the brain that changes itself. When this happens one builds a new circuitry within the brain. New neural networks are built that are more aligned with the actions you take to create change in your life, such as thinking a certain way, doing a particular habit everyday, perspective and paradigm shifts, etc. Change can be daunting but it only takes less than 30 days to create a new Neuro pathway within the brain to form a new habit. This helps us to become fearless in letting go of whatever no longer serves us.
There is also a holistic approach to this as well. With regard to the foods we eat. There are a lot of beautiful high frequency plant based foods that boost our energy and can effect our emotional state of mind when consumed. When eating a lot of processed food or non organic meat it messes with the biochemistry within our body, disrupting and unbalancing the equilibrium, bringing us to a lower vibration.
Asparagus is a mood enhancing food which boost stress relieving folic acid. Blueberries and oranges contain a high amount of vitamin C which helps reduce blood pressure and the stress hormone cortisol. Avocados are rich in stress relieving B vitamins and they are high in monosaturated fat and potassium which lowers blood pressure. Almonds are rich in B2 and E vitamins which boost immune system and lower blood pressure with monosaturated fat and potassium. A diet rich in omega-3 fatty acids helps keep cortisol and adrenaline from spiking when you’re feeling tense. Spinach is packed with magnesium, the mineral that helps regulate cortisol levels and promotes feelings of wellbeing. Thick cut or steel cut oatmeal is good for inducing serotonin levels which help keep you calm.
We also have to look at self confidence, not caring what other people think, which is the greatest form of self love. We have to have self confidence in order for us to follow our true calling. We are programmed for acceptance. Its ok to want to be accepted but we must not let it dictate all of our choices in life. Don’t be afraid to be the rogue star in the galaxy. Break out of the sheep mentality and follow your true calling. Average might keep you cozy at night but it may not fulfill you in the long run. You may get push back from your friends, family, and anyone else with influence in your life. I’m sure most of them mean well when they tell you not to take your desired course of action, but they are likely unaware or do not see how this will benefit you much more than the current path that you and everyone else in their world is on. We don’t have to compare ourselves but rather plunge ourselves into the moment. Just do it. Take Calculated risks, but as Wayne Gretzky said, you will miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.
According to speaker Brian Tracy, the greatest obstacle to success in adult life is the fear of failure. He says, “Taken to its extreme, we become totally pre-occupied with not making a mistake and seeking security above all other considerations.”
He says more than 99% of adults experience fear of failure, and that the solution to fear is the development of courage and self-esteem. The opposite of fear is actually self-love and self-respect. “Acting with courage in a fearful situation is simply a technique that boosts our regard for ourselves to such a degree that our fears subside and lose their ability to affect our behavior and our decisions,” says Tracy.
Benjamin Franklin once said, “People who are good at making excuses are seldom good at anything else.” As harsh as it may sound, if you want to get something done, you find a way to do it. Remove obstacles that do not serve you and move in the direction that does. Don’t make excuses to make yourself feel cozy with your inaction. Success loves speed. If you want to accomplish something, you got to get to work.
Live in the present moment and realize that all the power lies within you. The real magic is you taking action and not languishing in fear.